Yellowfin With A Side Serve Of Mako Shark

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Long Rambling Fishing Story by Bushy, Pic Above: Bushy with his Yellowfin

How good it is when you wake up on a Monday morning and know that you have got the whole day off, kick back, relax and basically do fark all. Well that would be the case if you were a cardboard coloured nowhere dopey, cause here at the HGM headquarters a day on the lounge just doesn't cut it -unless it was covered in baby oil and there is lots of the opposite sex's flesh getting swung around, luckily a pigeon hit the closed window with a note strapped round it's neck of a classified call to step up to the plate and head two hours off shore in search of the biggest fish that we could possibly wrestle. The instructions were delt down the line from fishing freak and captain of the ship- Daisy. He has been a long time buddy of mine and one of those mates you know if your going fishing with it's going to be a serious practice. Daisy was keen as a pelican at a boat ramp to grab the beer and the rest of the tackle into the boat ,as the sniff of a call, that the Yellowfin and Mako sharks were on the munch.

Now Im always up for cutting bait and rubbing fish guts down the front of a favourite white tee, especially if you can wash all that down with a cold beer, but at this stage we needed another deck hand, someone who would know the go and not get crook in the guts two hours out at sea. The captain made the final call and pulled the last maniac into the boat as we were good to set our sights on the horizon. The day was picture perfect with the sun blazing on all cylinders. The fancy knots were tied and a hundred bucks worth of high quality tackle was lobbed off the back and bounced across the water at a tantalising pace. The chair was kicked out, the first of the gold tops were cracked as we nestled into some story time. Half way through a semi-fictious story about how I punched out ten gang members trying to save a tall blond girl wearing nothing when "Crack!!" we were on. Now when the shit goes down everybody has a designated job. Daisy was straight into the back corner as the big gold outfit started to shine and deck hand "Matty'' went for the gimble belt so the butt of the rod wasn't going to give Daisy's own tackle a hiding. With the odd vein popping out his forehead, Daisy was locked in as the fish took off screaming with his lure. ''How big do ya reckon mate?" I belted out, ''Is that fish huge or are you just a pussy?'' - it's funny how even the biggest men and as for me the biggest bullshit artist's are put right back in there place as they are handed a fishing rod with a decent Yellow fin on the end. This was our first Fin and Daisy fought it well until suddenly it all turned to shit as the fish swam straight towards the boat putting a bow in the line thus setting it's self up to flick the hook- and that it did, right at Daisy's feet. ''Faaaarrrrk!!!'' gone. It was a good sized Yellow fin that put up a good fight and if was smart enough to flick the hook then it was deserving to swim another day. We set up the troll and I continued on with some more bullshit.

The moral in the boat was hitting rock bottom as the thought of getting another bite was dwindling, then there we had it 19 farkin degree's finally, so the captain piped up and changed the game plan. ''We drift in this current line, pull in those rods were cubing''. Now a smart fishermen knows that if there is no action then a change of attack is needed, and the frozen blocks of pillchards were cut into berly and dropped into the water at intervals. ''Feed that whole pilchard un-weighted down that berly trail and keep that sucker on free- spool''. Now there's nothing better than looking into the deep blue 2 hours from shore knowing that 'ANYTHING' from 2ft to 20ft could swim straight up to the back off the boat and start chewing the motor. We had been berlying for around half an hour when Matty's rod was screaming for attention, ''Fark Im on!!'' Matty was getting robbed as 80 bucks of line was pulled from his reel. After excitingly commentating Matty's battle for around 20 mins the line started to rise and first sign of a good sized Mako shark burst out of the drink. ''Holly shit Matty that thing is pissed" I yelled like a bitch. One thing is for sure that Mako sharks aren't to be farkt with, as when hooked they jump out of the water like crazy cats so we had to be careful for once that it didn't jump into the boat. Daisy and I started to heckle Matt to just get the bloody thing in cause he was showing signs of weakness as the shark dived again and again, ''Come on Matty get that thing in you big fag'' heckled Daisy. ''You bloody take the rod then smartass'' replied Matty. Just as the rod was passed, Daisy was on his tippy toes as the shark took yet another dive at the side of the boat. ''Shit!! it's still got some go in it". Daisy mumbled. My mouth was open and gut loads of laughter was spewing out. Finally the Mako was risen once again and a lengthy battle was conquered. After a few snap shots the decision was made to cut it free and we all went back for a well deserved sip of beer.

With the berly trail doing it's thing it wasn't long for my rod to finally resemble the harbour bridge, ''Bloody oath Im on!!''. The gimble belt was delt and the pump and wind game began as this was a good sized fish. Once again the tuff talk was jammed straight back into my mouth as my lower back was getting knifed. Within a few minutes I spotted my prize and a well presented gaff shot bought joy to my lower back and a good showoff fish to my feet. ''Good gaff shot mate" I cheered. The moral was at it's highest all day as the bottle necks were clashed.
''Well done boys''.

The sun was dropping it's guts over the horizon so the last call was made to troll home. We never got any more enquires on the way but none of us cared as we all had a battle with some of the oceans best. It's a pleasure to know that you set off with a plan and it's even more special when it goes to plan. This was just
another day in the HGM playground.

Covered in fish guts.

bUsHy...

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